My Dear Little Makena,
I've been meaning to do this for a long time now.
As I turn 40 soon, I feel the need to reach out to you.
I want to first start by telling you that you are loved... a lot more than you know.
I can still feel your fear because of the things you've been told that have shut you down.
If I could turn back time and see you, talk to you, I'd give you the biggest and longest hug, kiss you on your forehead and tell you that everything is going to be fine.
Makena, I know you feel abandoned right now.
There is so much you are going through that you are afraid no one will understand...
But I want you to know that I do.
Forgive your mother... I know she may seem quite harsh right now, but she is going through a lot, always trying to figure out how to make your life, better, but she loves you with all her heart.
Be nicer to your father and give him a break from time to time.
No sweetheart, you are not a burden.
Even if you are at the bottom of the class right now, even if you hate the way you look and feel about yourself, you are not worthless... you are not a failure.
You are so so much more than who you think you are!
And you may not believe this, but as you get older, you will appreciate the struggles you are experiencing right now.
I love how deep your imagination goes. Never ever lose that!
I know you spend most of your days alone, even in school, but it will teach you to be strong, and to be more than okay to be with yourself.
Thank you for being so brave, Makena.
You are my hero, I love you, and I will always be here for you.
You will never ever feel alone again.
39 year old Makena.